Shoots with Play
Someone called the other day and asked about a shoot. She's someone I know well and someone who knows what I do. She said she'd basically been stocking my IG for a while and she felt like she had gotten up the courage to ask for a shoot. We met for coffee and talked about it.
"So..." She said. "I have a confession."
I laughed and said something like, 'so long as you're not looking for absolution I think we'll be okay.'
She said. "It's kind of embarrassing."
I basically told her to spit it out and she said she wanted to do a shoot in one of the dungeon spaces and she wanted to incorporate play into the shoot. She felt like she was ready and said the idea turns her on "and makes me crazy!"
I'll point out that the model in these images is not the person who called me. This is another friend, Amanda, who is a fabulous model and fun to work with. We've never done a "shoot with play" but I love these images and wanted to use them as an illustration...
With that out of the way...
I told my friend that I was open to the idea, but that we would need to take it in stages. I never really "play" during someone's first shoot. We may tie and try some themes, we may enjoy the connection of the encounter, but my clothes stay on (they almost always do anyway) and I'm not going to touch you intimately in any way.
The reason is pretty simple. We never know how someone is going to respond. Do they love it and want to do more? Great. Let's do that. Do they feel weird about it? It happens. Do they feel shame? I hate it when it happens, but it does.
So we go slow.
My friend and I are moving forward into this connection with a LOT of communication. She's new to kink and she is very curious about the dynamics. We've talked about what she wants to experience and why.
It's always an honor to me when someone trusts enough to tell me what they want and then put themselves in my hands. To be sure, even the most sensual shoots are pretty "light duty" compared to a real kink experience. But it still gives people a chance to experience the sensations and then they can decide if they want to go further.